About the Creators

Jack "Porcelain Crusher" Berg
When he is not destroying bathrooms elsewhere, Jack resides at the University of Miami. Once considered to be a hindrance, Jack has embraced his lactose intolerance with open arms, and lots of baby wipes. He is going to be a pilot in the greatest Air Force in the world, his only concern pooping at 36,000 Feet. He won Mr. Universe and the Nathans hot dog eating contest in the same year. He is known as a mountain guide in the wildernerness of West Milford where he fought off a drunk naked teenager with a pillow and a cot. He has won the prestigious "rookie of the year" two years in a row at Club Weems. He regularly dines with Sean Connery and Bruce Willis.

G "That doesn't smell like mud" Money
Coming from a long line of destructive doodie makers, Gary is a legacy learner. He has inherited skills through DNA that most would kill for, posers have trained for years to try and duplicate his poo prowess and failed. They don't teach what he knows. He is currently a coach at a northeast college and when he isn't blowing up bathrooms he builds houses for the homeless, finds cures for constipation, and visits the nations capital, because he is that patriotic. Some of his notable achievements include being the 12-time World Champion of the annual Lavalette Bocce Tournament. He is also considered to be a Crabs Claw alcohol connoisseur and an asamble in the wine world. He once kicked Arnold Shwartzenegger in the balls for eating his cannolli.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

As I woke up this morning I found myself craving a nice cool breeze. So with a morning stew brewing, I approached the throne. Little to my knowledge, the temperature had dropped last night, and as I set up shop I felt a cool breeze coming through my window directly over the can. I thought to myself, what does the perfect dump involve? A cool breeze reducing any chance of busting beads while enjoying weight release was one of the first things to come to mind. So for all you people out there, when building a bathroom consider building a window at toilet level to allow the cool flow of a morning breeze over the throne while you take a non-sweaty dump.

Life is beautiful. What a great start to the day.


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