About the Creators

Jack "Porcelain Crusher" Berg
When he is not destroying bathrooms elsewhere, Jack resides at the University of Miami. Once considered to be a hindrance, Jack has embraced his lactose intolerance with open arms, and lots of baby wipes. He is going to be a pilot in the greatest Air Force in the world, his only concern pooping at 36,000 Feet. He won Mr. Universe and the Nathans hot dog eating contest in the same year. He is known as a mountain guide in the wildernerness of West Milford where he fought off a drunk naked teenager with a pillow and a cot. He has won the prestigious "rookie of the year" two years in a row at Club Weems. He regularly dines with Sean Connery and Bruce Willis.

G "That doesn't smell like mud" Money
Coming from a long line of destructive doodie makers, Gary is a legacy learner. He has inherited skills through DNA that most would kill for, posers have trained for years to try and duplicate his poo prowess and failed. They don't teach what he knows. He is currently a coach at a northeast college and when he isn't blowing up bathrooms he builds houses for the homeless, finds cures for constipation, and visits the nations capital, because he is that patriotic. Some of his notable achievements include being the 12-time World Champion of the annual Lavalette Bocce Tournament. He is also considered to be a Crabs Claw alcohol connoisseur and an asamble in the wine world. He once kicked Arnold Shwartzenegger in the balls for eating his cannolli.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Coming to you live from the mens bathroom at gate E5 departing for miami.

The man next to me is currently blasting farts so long and loud that I am beginning to feel uncomfortable and overpowered.

I find myself wondering, could it be a heavyset man producing that kind of fart power? Or is a smaller man who appears weak but packs the shit power of a cow? Maybe its someone we don't even know about. All I know fellas is that its not the size of the man that determines his fart-poop power.

While I attempt to play battle shits with this mystery man, I find I am fighting a losing battle. Will I ever see my opponent,who knows, but a good game of battle shits with a stranger at an airport: priceless.

Happy trails from the airport.
G Money
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