Poopy Prank!

Figured I would add this as well. Merc has posted the "poo-hammock", a long time favorite of mine I picked up from my friend from HS who ended up living with me in college as well (not Jorge). Call him Dank-Hawk. He is arguably the person I know with the longest-standing, most genuine appreciation of the hilarity that poop can incite. To this day, i still get pictures of particularly harrowing plops he has taken through text message, which to many is almost a prank in and of itself. However I would like to take a minute to toot my own horn, because poop pranks are not limited to the poo-hammock. A friend of mine from 5 apartements down in college had a girlfriend. And because most broads are completely fucking illogical and do not think about anything intelligently before they act, she decided to adopt a cat. This isn't a terrible idea if you ignore the fact that cats are soft as shit, and owning more than 2 of them is proof of pending clinical insanity (everyone has a local cat-lady who is batshit insane and genuinly believes they are her children), however she decided the best time to adopt would be 48 hours before she left for college, a college in which she was not allowed to keep pets, and a different one from where myself and her BF went. So she adopted the cat, and promptly gave it to my friend to keep while she was 6 hours away. Real fuckin logical. whatever. And let me tell you, this cat was a real piece of shit, and my friend was kind of a homo about it. The problem was, I had to deal with this thing all the time. When i described my house as a party box, i wasn't lying. No furniture, no tv, just pure, unadulterated drinkin', grindin' and fingerin' heaven. So my friends house essentially served as a living room, one occupied by a faggot cat that no one likes and shouldn't have been there in the first place. My solution to get rid of it? Shit pranks.

Answer me this: if your cat started taking huge, man-sized shits in your room, what would you do? stand up to your girlfriend and be like, enough is enough, take this stupid thing back? or maybe go the passive-aggressive route and tell her it "ran away" or got eaten by a badass, half-chocolate lab/half-retarded puppy? I sure hoped so. So I decided to start eating a load of chipotle double-meat and guac and hot salsa burrito's, and unleash hell on the litter box. I'm talking multiple meaty logs or cat-dissapearing dookie. And everyone knew, except for him. for about 5 or 6 months. And i know at least one person who joined in (yet another roommate, what a house!). Now did the cat go away? No, but let me tell you, there is nothing more priceless than seeing a friends face when he realizes he has spent a good part of 5 months sleeping 5 feet from your intentionally-aggressive shit, and been the only one who didn't know about it. So get out there, step your game up, and start poo-prankin' anyone and everyone. But for the love of god, get something more original than "upper-decking" people's toilets. What is this, High School? Thats the bush leagues bro, lock it up.