About the Creators

Jack "Porcelain Crusher" Berg
When he is not destroying bathrooms elsewhere, Jack resides at the University of Miami. Once considered to be a hindrance, Jack has embraced his lactose intolerance with open arms, and lots of baby wipes. He is going to be a pilot in the greatest Air Force in the world, his only concern pooping at 36,000 Feet. He won Mr. Universe and the Nathans hot dog eating contest in the same year. He is known as a mountain guide in the wildernerness of West Milford where he fought off a drunk naked teenager with a pillow and a cot. He has won the prestigious "rookie of the year" two years in a row at Club Weems. He regularly dines with Sean Connery and Bruce Willis.

G "That doesn't smell like mud" Money
Coming from a long line of destructive doodie makers, Gary is a legacy learner. He has inherited skills through DNA that most would kill for, posers have trained for years to try and duplicate his poo prowess and failed. They don't teach what he knows. He is currently a coach at a northeast college and when he isn't blowing up bathrooms he builds houses for the homeless, finds cures for constipation, and visits the nations capital, because he is that patriotic. Some of his notable achievements include being the 12-time World Champion of the annual Lavalette Bocce Tournament. He is also considered to be a Crabs Claw alcohol connoisseur and an asamble in the wine world. He once kicked Arnold Shwartzenegger in the balls for eating his cannolli.

Monday, October 5, 2009

In Tough Times...Our Domain Suffers A Loss

As the economy continues to struggle and our country falls further into debt, there are areas of major concern that seem to be constantly overlooked.

Ask yourself, what are the essentials needed when you walked in to use the throne? Peace and quiet...maybe. A cross breeze through the bathroom...maybe. Magazine...maybe. Scented spray...maybe. All of these may come to mind, but the most important of all is what allows you to finish the job. It allows you to build a nest on a toilet you might question. The answer gentleman is TP.

In these tough times, TP is an area that people have begun to go cheap on. The more the economy suffers, the closer bathroom TP is getting to resembling and feeling like sandpaper. Quality TP with a soft texture and possible nice scent tops off what can be an all around momentum booster for your day.

So I ask, when you go to the store, order TP for your office, or come across bad TP wherever it may be, make the right choice. Spend the extra dollar, put a complaint in the complaint box. Those around you, the real men, will appreciate your efforts to combat this battle. In tough times such as these, it is the job of real men to stand up for what they believe in.

GM
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